Mistaken Identity

18 thoughts on “Mistaken Identity”

  1. LOL Love the last paragraph. Now I am convinced that males are secretly pulled aside for separate instruction as children. Nobody’s going to notice, LOL.

    It’s my eyesight, not my brains! I SWEAR!

  2. Kinda reminds me of the time I placed a corn-dog in the microwave thinking 25 minutes … it’s weird how that stuff turns into a “polyvinyl chloride” type substance in about 16 minutes …

    Ooh, man. I don’t know if I’ve ever done that before. The worst I’ve gone in that direction was heating up soup for five minutes instead of three and having it explode all over the inside of the microwave. Thanks for coming by, Steve!

  3. You warmed up cookie dough? Everybody knows you’re supposed to eat that stuff cold. hehehe

    Believe me, it wasn’t intentional.

    Has your (lack of) vision ever made you do things in some places that were supposed to be done in other places. Like using the bidet instead of the toilet. hehehe

    Uh, no … no bidet. And I have SOME vision, but it’s hard to distinguish between certain unidentified items in unmarked packages in the fridge first thing in the morning. I also have a hard time reading, screen or print.

    But I’m guessing you don’t have a bidet. Best not to have one of those with little children in the home.
    “Mommy, Daddy, look, a sink I can reach without the stool! Now I can brush my teeth without the stool!”

    Well, no bidet, but those aren’t the reasons. Money is most of the reason.

    Could be worse, dude. You could have thought you were going to the bathroom and instead been going in the kitchen sink or the coffee maker. “Honey, I don’t know how you made the ocffee this morning, but it sure is goo-ood! Mmmm-mmm!”

    No wonder you have a chimp for your avatar. Ick.

  4. LMAO. I am sorry Darc, this is too funny. At least you didn’t put a bite in your mouth expecting potatoes. Pretty soon we are going to hear how your other half has to put locks on the fridge now. 😀

    Oh, I did taste it after I’d cooked it to figure out exactly what it was. And Falcon’s face when I told her the story was … well, priceless.

  5. Good job dude, bet the kitchen smelled pretty darn good though!

    Damn, now I’m hungry for both mashed taters and cookies!

    No, the cookie-cooking smell didn’t get going real good, so it just smelled doughy, like I said. But you’re the second to crave taters from the post! HA!

  6. I can understand the disappointment. I could live happily on mashed potatoes and nothing else–cold, hot, instant, real–it’s all good to me.

    Me too. My wife HATES instant though. And then she HATES the work associated with REAL, so wth, y’know? Can’t please ’em.

    Oh look, it’s time for lunch….

    Eureka! It IS!

  7. This was so funny, I laughed for 5 minutes. Thanks I needed that.

    I’m glad you liked it, Bonnie, and thank YOU for stopping by and letting me know! 🙂

  8. Yup, potatoes are one of my favorites, too. It’s when you start looking like one, you kind have to stop and eat some salad. I’ve brushed my teeth with neosporin before. That will wake you right up and my eyesights just fine. 🙂 Hilarious! No more food in front of the computer.

    YOW! Neopsporin toothpaste! UGH!! Ptuey!! 😉 OH, and if I still looked as good as a potato, I’d be happy. I’m well into “pumpkin” at this point.

  9. Thank you much for the laugh i needed today. And dont feel bad everybodies been there for one reason or another. So the question is what become of the Nuka Dough?

    I’m happy you enjoyed it! I got a good laugh out of it too. 😉 I think the dough’s still in the fridge, waiting a decision on whether it survived or not. Hehehe.

  10. Great story. (So many tales of guys in the kitchen end with laughs. The men of the Food Network have to be some sort of aliens.) For a moment there I thought you’d been experimenting with a chembot.

    If you can hunt down a copy — haven’t been able to find it online, except in brief references — you might get a laugh out of James Thurber’s piece called “The Admiral at the Wheel.” One of those references, called Encyclopedia of the Essay, says:

    “Thurber, almost completely blind, wrote that ‘The kingdom of the partly blind is a little like Oz, a little like Wonderland… Anything you can think of, and a lot you would never think of, can happen there.’ In such a world… common objects ‘blur into fantasy’ as Thurber, without his glasses, sees such remarkable sights as “a gay old lady with a gray parasol walk right through the side of a truck,” and an electronic welder is transformed into ‘a radiant fool setting off sky-rockets by day.'”

    I bet Thurber would have been right there with you in the kitchen. (He was certainly right there with you when you wrote this post!)

    LOVE those references! I’ll have to look for this one … thanks, JES, and I’m glad you got a giggle out of this. Normally I’m pretty facile in the kitchen … when my eyesight permits. 😉

  11. Oh man. I feel for you with the eyesight problem. I can’t see a dang thing without prescription lenses, and even with them my left eye sometimes just stops focusing at the end of a long day. But none of that is as bad as wasting perfectly good cookie dough. 🙂

    Well, if it were correctable, I’d be less miserable. But it’s not, so why complain, I guess, right? Still, the dough is … yes, there’s just … so much senseless slaughter. 😉

  12. All I can do is just shake my head at the thought of you thinking you could hide the fact that you nuked the dough from Fal. Silly silly men – WE KNOW ALL!

    I think I’m going to find a place that serves mashed potatoes for lunch. I hear Boston Market calling my name!

    I think KFC has the best mashed ‘taters going, but that’s me. 😉

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